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Saturday, 14 August 2010
Haven't done anything much today. Watched a bit of Athletics on the television, but that is about it. I am quite tired. Still feel a lot more clogged up than I would like, given that I have an audition tomorrow. Will go and do a steam inhalation in a minute. I feel really tired today and I am not sure why, as I slept ok I think. It was late when I got to sleep, as usual, but I think I got 8 or 9 hours, so I shouldn't be this tired. My weight was pretty much the same today as it was yesterday, which is pretty shit. I feel like such a failure for not being able to lose weight. And I can't decide what to wear for my audition tomorrow. If it was nice weather it wouldn't be too bad, but it doesn't look like it is going to be very nice, and I never know what to wear in not very nice summer weather, and even more so at the moment when I have so few clothes to choose from. I really need to decide today, because if I leave it until tomorrow then I will spend at least an hour trying on different things, and getting more and more stressed, and probably make myself late, and it will all be a bit of a disaster, so I need to get organised tonight. I hate deciding what to wear. Particularly if it is something important. And not only will the audition panel see me tomorrow, but all of the auditions are being filmed to send off for someone else to see. I know that how I sing matters more than what I wear, but I will stress more about what to wear! I would be utterly amazed if I got cast anyway, so I am primarily going for the experience. But what to wear?! It is so much easier in the winter when you can wear tights and boots, or even tights and heels. Tights improve legs dramatically I find! But in the summer I have no idea what to wear, particularly when it isn't warm. Which let's face it, is most of the time in this country. Suggestions on a postcard...
I am a 24 year old female, currently embroiled in the Mental Health minefield. My diagnonsense is Borderline Personality Disorder, and I also have problems with Depression, Anxiety and disordered eating. Bippidee is my nickname for BPD, as stolen from the fantastic mentalnurse.
If you know me in real life, then please respect my wish for anonymity here.
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