Thursday, 11 March 2010
I am really struggling. I don't really know why. I feel very emotional. Very tired all the time. I had the one night where I got to sleep at 1, but I still didn't sleep well, then the next night I got to sleep about half 4 and again slept badly, then last night was quite disturbed again. So lack of sleep probably isn't helping. My weight is getting me down enormously. I have been trying to be careful with what I have been eating, and am certainly nowhere near 2000kcal a day, but anything I manage to lose on a day when I really restrict goes straight back on if I actually eat. Feeling very suicidal. Hate myself. Feel like I am a disgusting, repulsive person, both physically and inside.