Monday, 29 March 2010
I have been thinking about it and I am not going to go and see L tomorrow. I feel like I am wasting her time. I can't do the things she is asking me to do (get into a better sleep pattern, go out for walks, eat regularly rather than my chaotic all over the place style, etc etc) because I just feel too bad and it is too difficult. And if I am not going to do what she is telling me to do there is no point me seeing her. She could be spending her time helping someone who might actually get better. Whereas I have had enough, I don't want to be here anymore. I know that people will think I should go, but there really isn't any point. I know what I want, and that is to not be here, so seeing her is just wasting her time.